A lot this discussion sheds some light on how I am being presently treated in a present transaction.
I won an article from a UK seller that, in fairness, I was not all that enthusiastic about in the end. The second place bidder is known to us and was eager to take the article off my hands--for a little less than I paid for it, of course (fair is fair). The seller would categorically not consider a third party or "gift" shipment to the other individual, even though I paid him immediately and I am both confirmed and verified on PayPal. That is fair enough--he has every right not to deviate from standard practice if he doesn't want to.
What has been more than I have been willing to take is the terse, brief, inflexible, unhelpful, and downright rude little emails oriented more to what he would not do for me rather than what he would. I have received no acknowledgment of payment received (though it cleared PayPal immediately), no word about when the article would ship (though he has made it clear it would not go to the requested third party), and, what really gets me, not even a thank you for my business and for my very quick payment.
I have been so unimpressed with the tone of this transaction that two outstanding bids I had had with the seller I retracted. I claimed "entered wrong amount", which is technically not untrue--I don't want to deal with this surly so-and-so at all now, and therefore any bid on his stuff is the "wrong amount" for me. If the eBay police suspend my account for misuse of the retraction feature, so be it--I have been spending too much money anyway. But I just can't bear to deal with the seller again after how crappy this one transaction has made me feel, so I am willing to take my chances. I don't know how the feedback will play out--I don't want to give this guy positive feedback, but if I get the article as advertised I have no case for negative feedback either. Maybe I will just not bother--the fellow has his 99.4% bevy of admirers, so obviously I am just a complaining misfit, right?
Maybe this is tied into the issues raised in this thread. Maybe this UK fellow, who is a high volume high feedback seller, has been scammed before and in a knee-jerk response simply assumes that my admittedly tentative requests to consider flexible options were an effort to cheat him. If that is how the climate has become, it is best for me to cut my losses and walk away from it. I assume that, with rare exceptions, eBay sellers, especially those dealing with calculators, are reasonable, honest, and friendly people, and I assume they are trustworthy until given evidence to believe otherwise. I like to be treated the same.
Les